I’m FragileSwan! And this is WordPress!

I did all the research and wrote this whole post all by myself, and I’m just a girl! Mitsubishi is releasing a 100% battery-powered passenger automobile called simply, The Mitsubishi i. Mitsubishi representatives were asked what, i, stands for, but no one in the company seems to know.

There aren’t many purely battery-powered cars, at least not in the thirty-thousand Dollar (read: affordable) price range. So, we get a rare glimpse of just how advantageous electric cars are.

First, the car runs on electricity, so it has no involvement or dependency upon the diabolical evil perpetrated by Western-capitalist petroleum miner/refiners. The great thing about environmentalism is the opportunity to battle the architect of evil itself, thereby saving the world and all its inhabitants from everything but deadly diseases caused by sodomy, and feminists dying under the curse of childlessness; OH, and lest I forget THE BASTION OF GODLESSNESS, OREGON!

The owner’s manual is printed on brown paper made from recycled toilet tissue, each sheet having been used seven times before being turned over for redemption. Inside is a certificate for free sushi made from waste polyethylene beverage containers, and a petition giving grass the right to file federal lawsuits to recover damages for dismemberment due to mowing!

It was only a matter of time before the Japanese figured out how to make sushi from an organic polymer. About the car, picture a world filled with autos that can travel 62 miles between twenty-two-hour-long battery recharging.

But see, gasoline puts dangerous hydrocarbon emissions into the atmosphere. The fuel used to generate the electrical power to recharge the electric car only results in triple the the hydrocarbon emissions of fossil-fuel burning cars.

This is because power plants must convert raw fuel to steam to drive a turbine that drives an electrical generator, and then distribute the power over vast distances, for use by consumers and industry.

In that entire process, two-thirds of the energy stored in the fossil fuel is lost, and one-third is delivered as electrical power. I can just hear all the lesbians and sodomites, “I swore to my high-school algebra teacher that I would never use any of the white-male-superiority rhetoric spouted in math class.

“If it weren’t for white male children who learn too much too quickly, we could have racial equality in public-school classrooms.”  So, electric-car fuel costs three-times what gasoline does. But here’s the greatest part: NO HEATER AND NO AIR CONDITIONING!!

This bad boy does 0-60 mph in 13 seconds. It’s easy to get it up on two wheels by turning too sharply. But it’s goodness for all mankind. And electric cars emit only ozone!

Regardless of how low environmentalists rank on the intellect index; without giving a thought to how much MORE pollution will be added to the environment, electric cars are what Barack Obama and the green left want for you!

But why? Because you’re too stupid to know what’s best for you, so leftist politicians and their godless-pervert allies are going to decide for you what you really want and what’s really good for you. If you don’t like it, too bad; unless you guys get out there crack open some good ol’ American whoop-ass!

But don’t urinate standing, because that’s a dangerous expression of masculine superiority and domination! If Obama has his way, masculine males will be legally required to drive electric cars, and to sit like little girls when they pee.

I’m FragileSwan! And this has been WordPress!